Why Is Setting Goals So Important?

Posted on by Marko Kircanski

Dear friend,

One of the greatest feats of strength is our ability to set goals and relentlessly work on them. The sheer thrill of knowing that our dreams are possible to accomplish makes us happy beyond recognition. If happiness can be described through one action, I believe this would be it. However, there’s a crucial component many disregard to acknowledge upon starting to search for that bigger why.

You Have Time To Reach Your Goal

The excitement of a challenge can boost our creativity, ambition, motivation, and especially our determination. However, there’s something that can hinder this wonderful feeling. It’s the realization that some goals might not happen right away. The idea of an constant sprint running down this imaginary racetrack is often unrealistic, because knowing more time is needed is essential. So I’ll be the first one to admit that I’m not a patient person.

You need to accept the fact that more time is needed to reach that goal. I can perfectly understand that you want it right here and right now, but if you speed things up, a whole lot of bad things will happen. You might overwhelm yourself, loose your health, and even the sight of that dream you have. And this is just to name a few.

There are all kinds of emotions that’ll try finding their way into our mind when we pursue our goals, including: fear, anxiety, overwhelm, even panic. Then we’ll start asking questions like: “Why is this happening to me?” or “Why things didn’t work out like I planned, and when I planned?”. Ring a bell? Well they made me feel nauseous.

So what would be a good solution for making your most precious dream a reality without all the negative aspects that journey brings?
How can we approach this situation, and preserve our peace of mind at the same time?

Stop Rushing Yourself!

The first thing you have to do is, stop rushing yourself. Everything will happen in the exact moment when it’s supposed to happen, and not a minute sooner. If you speed it up, you will miss out the present moment my friends. And what good is reaching that finishing line if you don’t enjoy what happens before that?

Slow down, take a breather, and then continue. Second, when you set out to do something, and as long as you’re not hurting anyone in any way, move the mountains themselves to do it. If your goal hasn’t arrived yet, it’s because it’s not in season, but it will come. That I assure you.

Last but not least, the third thing you have to do is believe that what you’re going through right now is happening for a reason. I know, this is such a cliché advice. But please hear me out. Everything that is happening, what happened, was/is there to prepare you for everything you are seeking. This is your training camp, and your warm up practice before the big game.

You will reach your goals, have no doubt about it. They are not going anywhere because they are yours, and no one can take them away from you. Whatever it is you are searching right now, is searching you, too!

You may have to face the most difficult test of your life to make that dream a reality. But few feelings and emotions are equal to how you will feel knowing you actually did it. And we know you will. 🙂

So, as we at Dauntless Inspiration always say: GO DO YOUR THING!

Xo,

Marko

Where are you now when it comes to reaching that main goal you have? How do you feel about the journey you’re on to get to it? We would love to hear from you in the comments below! 🙂

Why Everything Happened The Way It Did

Posted on by Marko Kircanski

Dear friend,

It’s not easy to face our past. Few people ever gather the courage to look their past right in the eye and say they moved on. What you need to remember is, it happened because it was supposed to teach you something. It happened, because it needed to bring you where you are now.

Why We Need To Face Our Past

A while ago I had a chance to say hi to my past, literally. I saw a person who meant the world to me almost ten years ago, but this time something was different. Instead of putting her on a pedestal like I used to and saying yes to her every demand and suggestion, something else happened entirely.

I moved on. When I looked into her eyes, I knew I’m this new, brave person who embraced being who he is, where I am now, and where I really want to be. Of course I’m doing what I can to reach that goal that occupies my attention, but a much more important moment happened in my mind that day.

I left my past where it belongs, behind me. Good memories and moments are always welcomed, but that’s about it. You see, most of us tend to dwell in the past, because we relish the chance to question it relentlessly. We ask ourselves: Maybe I could have done something differently… Let me be honest with you right now:

No, you couldn’t.

It Happened Exactly How It Was Supposed To Happen

Everything that has ever happened to you needed to happen. Every single difficulty, lonely moment, pain, and judgment had to come to pass so you could be ready to receive everything you ever wanted. Maybe you’re not where you want to be right now, and that’s okay. Shake off the doubt, shake of the negativity. Remember your dream, because you will reach it.

Look at your past, but leave it where it belongs, far behind you. Let what happened be a proof what a wonderful person you’ve become. Know how giving, caring, and understanding you already are. This is something you should be proud of every single day.

That’s what I am asking you to do. Leave your past-self, and let it go my dear friend. What has transpired wasn’t a punishment. Quite the contrary, it was a lesson, and nothing more. Stop torturing your gentle mind with different outcomes and what could have happened. It’s not just about releasing your previous life and accepting it, but also not allowing it to control you.

If your dream wasn’t alive, on track, and right on schedule, you wouldn’t have so many roadblocks coming against you. Maybe you tried five years ago or ten years ago. It didn’t work out? Start again. Let go of your past, because when you do, you are allowing yourself to embrace the present, and plan the future. You agree giving that future a fighting chance to unfold in all it’s glory and greatness you deserve to have. ❤

Here at Dauntless Inspiration, we are your biggest fans, and we are cheering for you every step of the way. You got this! 🙂

Love,

Marko

Have you accepted what happened in your past? Are you still struggling with this? Let us know in the comments below, we would love to hear from you!

Why It’s Okay To Be Vulnerable

Posted on by Marko Kircanski

Dear friend,

I always found it difficult to open up to people and be vulnerable. Being hurt so many times, I figured if I keep it all to myself, then no one will be able to hurt me again. But the only thing I managed to do is overwhelm my mind to a point where I felt incredibly lonely. However, there are days when I get a reminder why being vulnerable doesn’t have to be that difficult, and why it’s actually a strength.

Being vulnerable is not a weakness

When you’re being vulnerable in front of someone you cherish, you’re not just opening up to them. Something more happens. You are actively revealing pieces of your soul to that person. You are opening the gates of your inner self, allowing that human to touch your heart, and feel your pain.

I’m not saying that you should share your most private and beloved moments with everyone you meet. Believe me, I did that in the past and got hurt plenty of times.  But every once in a while, you’ll meet someone with whom you will feel that “click” right from the start. You will literally finish each other sentences. 🙂

Vulnerability can be hard, there’s no question about it. Understand, large majority of us were abandoned, hurt, or mocked at some point by the people we thought that will always be there for us. This is why need so much time to trust someone. But opening up is not a weakness. It’s actually one of the most courageous acts you’ll ever do.

Wear your heart on a sleeve

Don’t be afraid to be vulnerable. I never believed in the term fearless, because fear is the greatest motivator there is. Even if you get hurt, and face abandonment that scares you so much, open your heart to the selected few whom you trust.

I was always the one who had troubles with being vulnerable to begin with, but because of all those people who left me when I needed them the most, I learned how precious are those who will embrace me, just the way I am.

My support circle is not big, and in fact, in only consists of a few people that I know I can count on at all times. Knowing that, I’m able to wear my heart on a sleeve, and so should you. I know you’re scared of being hurt again. But I can promise you, it will be less painful to be hurt once more, than close your heart forever and be indifferent.

See the good in people

Trust in people and let them in. I cannot promise that everything is going to be okay, but I can assure you that you will feel something many people spend their entire lives trying to find. You will feel free and safe. There isn’t a greater feeling than hearing those three, beautiful words: “I understand you.”

I’m not going to lie, you will be hurt at some point. This is life, and it will happen. But it will all be worth it in the end, because being vulnerable will bring you the right people that will be there when you need them the most.

Reach out to your friends and open your heart and soul. Tell them how you feel, let them know how much they mean to you, and share with them what lies on your mind. In the meantime, allow me to say: I understand you. ❤

Xo,

Marko

What are your thoughts on vulnerability? What’s your experience with being vulnerable? We would love to hear your thoughts in the comments below!

I Don’t Play Games, Speak Your Mind!

Posted on by Marko Kircanski

Dear friend,

I never liked playing games. When I say games, I mean the ones where someone is literally playing with our feelings and emotions. Don’t get me wrong, it’s okay to have fun sometimes, no harm in that. But the kind of games I’m talking about here always send a chill through my spine.

I don’t play games, speak your mind

The explanation for getting to the point preference comes from our trait that searches for meaning and purpose. I must emphasize once more, we love having a good laugh. But there’s a difference between fun and hurting someone. Allow me to explain.

Imagine this scenario: You like someone and you are sending signals to that person that you like them. You start letting them know this in your own unique way. But they are playing with your mind, sending mixed messages, or late-responsive ones with unclear reasons why, childish sentences, and the list goes on and on.

The situation above happened to me more times than I can count. This is why I’m always crystal clear with my intentions. I don’t play mind games that will hurt anyone’s feelings and emotions. Instead, I always insist for that individual to speak their mind and be completely honest.

I want you to remember what I’m about to say. The worst truth will hurt less than the best lie.

So the question is, why this type of behavior doesn’t suit us? Why it’s more repelling than attracting?

Honesty is attractive

The answer is because we like authenticity. We value honesty, respect, and understanding. We also fully realize that there is a small amount of people who will give us that feedback at the same level that we so selflessly give. So we just want from that person to honor how we feel and be frank with us.

There are many people that are always open for jokes and fun. But that needs to be only until the point where our emotions are not being toyed with. I consider myself to have a very broad and weird sense of humor, but I can’t laugh over a fact that someone uses my kindness in a negative way.

It doesn’t matter how young or old you are, this behavior can be universal. And in most cases, there’s no bad intent behind it. I want to believe that people mean no harm when they sometimes make jokes about how we feel. But there’s a thin line between understanding and insult.

This is why honesty can be so damn attractive! Tell us what the situation really is, and don’t play with how we feel. This acts like a magnet that will draw us closer to you. But we all have our limits when it comes to hurtful behavior. There’s an incredible quote from a famous Canadian poet Najwa Zebian that perfectly explains how we react to coldness, mean jokes, and indifference:

“Fear the day a good heart gives up on you. A heart does not turn cold unless it’s been treated with coldness for a while.”

Your heart can withstand so much, and that’s the truth. It can sustain enormous levels of being hurt, and still find a way to shine and spread the light. I like comparing it with a lighthouse that shows the way. 🙂

So give that gentle, light-spreading miracle in your chest a gift in the form of a presence of someone who will not toy with it, but cherish it. You earned that kindness. ❤

Xo,

Marko


How do you cope when someone makes jokes about your emotions? What’s your defense mechanism? We would love to hear your thoughts in the comments below!

Why We Sabotage Our Own Happiness

Posted on by Marko Kircanski

Dear friends,

We tend to have a bad habit of sabotaging ourselves when we’re at a good point in our life. It’s as if we’re actively searching for a self-destruct button every time when we are happy. Self-sabotage has it’s root deeply embedded into the core of every personality types. Understanding why we do this is a bit tricky, but it can be conquered and understood.

Why do we sabotage ourselves?

The main reason why we sabotage our own happiness may be difficult to hear. It took me quite a while to accept it, but once I did, I managed to end this vicious circle. It’s because most of us want for everyone to be happy, but that we are somehow excluded from it. So when happiness finds us, we start overthinking because we think we’re not worthy to feel it.

The primary focus should be to fully enjoy these joyful moments, but we choose something else. Does this sound familiar: “This is good, but I should be careful, maybe something bad is coming…” And there you have it our friends, instant recipe for overthinking. We completely disregard our own success, and replace it with overthinking and sabotaging thoughts.

I sabotaged almost every win I ever had. It doesn’t matter how meaningful it was, I always thought that something bad is looking at me behind the corner. So instead of being genuinely happy, I disregarded what I achieved, and went into caution mode to avoid any possible disappointment that may come.

Guided by my own self-sabotage experiences from the past, I want to tell you…

Be happy in the now

There’s no such thing as a small or a big achievement. Every victory you experience, personal or a business, is meaningful! Don’t rank it by size, because you will only succeed in shrinking yourself. You did it, you won, so stop there. Don’t go further. You did all you could, where you were, and with what you had. You did more than enough.

As I mentioned, in the past I always sabotaged what I did. I just couldn’t make myself to be happy for my accomplishments. However, I started nurturing myself after every win, instead of seeking what I could have done to improve it. When you reach your goal, when you just enjoy what you did, embrace it with no add-ons.

The best way I found to conquer self-sabotage is through a simple exercise that’ll only take you 5 min.

Look around you and where you are now. You’re reading this article, which means you’re safe. Nothing bad is happening to you right now at this very moment. Acknowledge that you are not in any danger, and don’t think what will happen tomorrow. In this present moment, you are good. Please repeat this as many times as you need until you remember it.

Ground yourself in your current location, because this mindset shift will help you accept the reality. You are safe, and you can be happy.

Sometimes, our biggest wins come from quietest moments.

Self-Sabotage is not your default state

As you’re looking around your room, or a coffee shop, or nature, nothing bad is happening to you. So now your mind has the space to be happy with what you achieved.

You’re probably asking yourself: “But Marko, I’m not sure what I achieved?”

Aren’t you still here? You’re breathing and your existence is making someone happy whether you see it or not. Wins don’t always come in forms of promotions, money, or career… Sometimes, they’re as gentle as reading a message from a loved one telling you how much they love you, or having that peaceful sip of coffee in the morning.

Give yourself the permission to smile about the things most people never notice. When you do, self-sabotage will never again take a hold over you, because you’ll always know what you need to do to make it go away.

So the next time when you win and feel fulfilled, close the door on those self-sabotaging thoughts. Open the window for happiness to come in. It’s your birthright to be happy and bathed with the rays of joy for who you are! 🙂

Xo,

Marko

Do you tend to sabotage your success? What are your thoughts on this topic? We would love to hear from you in the comments below!

Establishing Healthy Boundaries: The Ultimate Self-Care Act

Posted on by Marko Kircanski

Hi friends,

Establishing healthy boundaries is vital for our self-care. This action alone can save us from so much negativity, external pressure, and draw lines we should never cross. However, it’s always easier said than done. But you need to establish these boundaries, no matter how difficult they may seem at first glance.

Why we need healthy boundaries

Have you ever watched the movie with Jim Carrey “Yes Man”? Well if you didn’t, spoiler alert. The main character is filled with constant business and lack of self-respect, so one day he decides to say yes to every request he’s been given (I was there, too). Without going into the reasons why he did this, I’ll tell you why this would be an absolute disaster.

Saying yes to everything and everyone is a clear example of the lack of boundaries. If you’re having trouble with this, please don’t blame yourself, because you haven’t done anything wrong. You are just a compassionate and understanding human, and you would rather sacrifice your own well-being than cause a potential conflict, which is perfectly reasonable. But you need to draw a line somewhere.

When you say no to going out into a crowded, noisy pub, or when you say no to a social gathering where you know you will be overwhelmed, you are saying yes to yourself. You are saying yes to spending the night watching Netflix and eating ice cream, simply enjoying. You are saying yes to sweet solitude or the company of that one special person with whom you can talk about the stars or your favorite book characters. You are saying yes to what you really want to do. 🙂

This is why we need to create healthy boundaries.

It’s not your job to indulge everyone

Establishing healthy boundaries is not just about saying no, it goes much deeper. It’s when you say to your dearest ones you need some time alone, and when you need time to figure out and handle your emotions. This is one of the ultimate act of self-care we need to give ourselves.

Your true friends, the people who are meant to stay in your life will never think about your boundary as a selfish act. They will fully respect and honor it, and those who don’t? Well, then you have to ask yourself is this the friendship or a relationship that I want in my life.

It’s not your job to indulge everyone and to say yes to every demand. This is a one way ticket to overwhelm, anxiety, and lack of self-respect. When you’re saying no to something you know it will not feel comfortable, you’re saying yes to yourself and opening the doors for doing what makes you happy.

Remember, those who genuinely love you will never take your “no” as an insult. They will accept it as a sign of respect. Most importantly, they will understand, and these are the people you should have in your life.

So the next time when you’re about to make an important decision, put yourself first my dear friend. You’re not arrogant, you’re simply giving yourself the same attention that you so selflessly give to everyone else. You earned that respect from you, too.

Give a little kindness to yourself by creating boundaries that will not just benefit you and your gentle being, but also deepen those connections you have with the people you cherish the most. It will be worth it. 🙂

Love,

Marko

What’s your experience with creating healthy boundaries? As always, we would love to hear your thoughts and insights on this in the comments below!

How To Effectively Conquer Loneliness

Posted on by Marko Kircanski

Dear friend,

Loneliness is the biggest obstacle slowing us down on the road to reaching happiness. Not many feelings cause so much anxiety and sadness. The fact that separates loneliness from other roadblocks on our road to fulfillment is that it can show its face anytime and anywhere. So conquering it is extremely difficult.

Why is overcoming loneliness so hard?

Have you ever found yourself surrounded by a huge crowd of people, hearing the sound of dreaded small talk, plus sensing judgmental eyes looking straight at you? This alone makes many of us feel lonelier than almost any other situation. Even to this day I keep hearing: “He is so weird”, because I love spending hours in bookstores alone, and because I would rather have a relaxed evening with a friend than go clubbing in a pub.

If I’m honest, I feel lonely where I am currently. This is not permanent of course, because there are many moments when happiness does find its way to my face and makes me smile. But my loneliness comes from the knowledge that everyone I hold dear live thousands of miles away. Luckily, social media gives me the chance to communicate with those I cherish the most on a daily basis.

In the past, I would follow my career and where it took me would be an okay place for me to be. Now it’s much different. Having sacrificed years of my life to have a career I love and doing what I really want to do, I became extremely lonely as a consequence of that choice. However, there are positive changes happening. 🙂

Overcoming loneliness can be hard, because so many of us often feel misunderstood and rejected. We feel that no one understands us and that we are all alone in our way of thinking. It’s not easy to win the battle against feeling lonely, but it is definitely possible. In order to do that you need to…

Fully Embrace Who You Are

If you want to overcome loneliness you need shake off doubt. Shake of the self-criticism. There is enough of that from others around us. Make yourself your own biggest support. Train, no sorry, order your mind to be your ally.

I’m not saying that loneliness will magically disappear once you speak with your inner self. In fact, it will still be there. But only you can decide will it put you on your knees or propel you to your dreams.

When you do feel lonely, know that feeling is not there to stop you. It’s there to show you that you can do this. Wherever you are right now, and whatever thoughts are rushing through your gentle mind, remember this. Everything that comes your way is not more than you can handle.

Accept your own company, because this is the foundation of how you can reduce the effect of loneliness and conquer it completely. Do whatever makes you feel fulfilled at that given moment, no matter how small it may seem. Take yourself out, indulge yourself, spend some time with you own thoughts and with those you love the most, and I promise you will a better! But before you let someone else in your life, you need to feel comfortable with yourself.

Know that every single event, person, word or feeling that made you feel lonely was there to teach you something. It entered your life to tell you what I’m about to.

Loneliness Is A Road-Sign To Success

Feeling lonely doesn’t feel good, but it has a purpose. It’s there to show you that you are capable of handling everything life throws at you and propel you to where you really want to be. Overcoming loneliness requires strength that you already have, and people will see this, they will be drawn to it.

Do not despair if you feel misunderstood or judged because of who you are. This doesn’t mean there is something wrong with you. It means you are unique, and that those few, selected ones will understand you. They will be drawn to your mystical, kind, generous nature, and they will embrace it. Just like they will accept you for who you are.

This is not something that might happen. People who are meant to be in your life will come to you and stay. This will happen my friend. It’s only a matter of time, that’s all. Until it does, know that you are enough, you always were. 🙂

Have you ever felt lonely? What is your experience with this? We would love to hear from you in the comments below!

Love,

Marko