Dear friend,
Nothing is more powerful than a clear, conscious determination. When we want to reach a goal, few things can deter us from it. As long as we’re not hurting anyone in any way, we shouldn’t give up, because it’s in our DNA to make a difference and go that extra mile. But you need to know when to stop if what you want to accomplish is overwhelming you. Sometimes, knowing enough is enough can be difficult to see.
Knowing when enough is enough
Don’t confuse knowing when to stop with surrendering. Stopping is not the same as giving up. When you give up on something or someone, that’s something truly unimaginable for the majority of us. It’s in human nature to stay connected and do what we can to fix the situation. But withdrawing from a person or a career that is toxic and is overwhelming us is something else entirely.
Learning how to stop can be a lifelong challenge, no mistake about it. I know so many people who are hardcore idealists, but this is how problems with knowing when its’ enough tend to appear. That persistence can blind us from seeing when enough is enough.
When you tell yourself that you had enough of that toxic treatment from someone, or moments when you are humiliated by your boss or coworkers, that’s called courage. You’re not giving up, you are actually protecting yourself in the bravest way possible.
When you decide to withdraw in peace instead of getting into a heated argument, that’s called strength. So the question needs to be asked…
When is a good time to stop?
It depends from person to person. For example, I found out I have the rarest personality type (INFJ) when I was 25 years old. Before my INFJ finding, I played the extroverted role for so long, that I actually didn’t believe when my MBTI result showed that I’m an INFJ.
A small side-note here, many people I admire in life are extroverts, so this is in no way me saying that’s a bad thing. Actually, the INFJ personality is called the extroverted introvert. 🙂
So for me, the crucial moment was when I stopped wearing masks and fully accepted myself instead. Of course I have moments when I doubt myself. But when I decided that I had enough of pretending I’m someone else, and stopped chasing something that might look good on the surface, but could harm me in the future, everything changed.
It all looks easy when it’s written like this, does it? But let me assure you, in order for you to blossom, you need to let some people go, at least those who are toxic. I learned that I need to follow my heart and believe what my mind tells me, even if I’m alone in it. So I stopped following the crowd and started listening myself.
How will we know?
There’s no such a thing as a good time to know when enough is enough. You create that moment yourself. It’s similar when someone tells you: “I’ll do this when I’m ready”. The truth is that if you wait for the perfect moment, it will never come. There’s no such thing. It’s always a good time to do what is right, and in our case, to choose ourselves.
You’re not giving up on anyone. Some people will be against you no matter what you do, and you will be judged regardless of what you do. It’s up to you to decide will you continue that pointless pursuit, or say to yourself: “Stop, that’s enough.”
I hope you choose yourself my dear friend, because you are enough, even if there’s no one there to acknowledge it. <3
Much love,
Marko
P.S When time allows you, please feel free to join our official and private Facebook Group (now over 250 members, yay!) where you’ll be fully accepted and supported, just the way you are. We would love to see you there! 🙂
What are your thoughts on knowing when to stop and letting go? How do you handle this? We would love to hear your thoughts in the comment section below!